Game of Thrones – S6E4 – Book of the Stranger – Recap...

Hi, and welcome to another installment of my Game of Thrones recaps. For any new readers, be forewarned, I like to use nicknames. It all started as a way to keep a bunch of characters who mostly looked alike straight in my head, but even now that I’ve read the books and know everyone’s name, in a few cases, the nicknames have stuck. I welcome any and all comments. And away we go… We open on Jon Snow and Bear Claw, er, Longclaw. I don’t think I’ll ever not mistake the name of that sword with the name of Josh Gad’s semi-recurring character on New Girl.  Edd is talking to Jon, trying to convince Jon to stay. But Jon is headed south. He’s been up at Wall long enough and wants to get warm. Edd is feeling abandoned. Just as Jon basically says nothing could keep him at the wall,  Brienne, Sansa, and Pod show up at the gate. Well, almost nothing could keep you at the Wall, Jon. Did everyone catch the way Tormund eyed Brienne? I am 100% shipping Redbeard/Brienne. Who’s with me? They need a good couple name. Who has a good one? Jon and Sansa hug like they’re in November Project. #hugeveryone. They eat together for the first time since early in season one. Jon says, “We never should have left Winterfell.” Sansa agrees with him. Remember back in season one when Sansa was the worst? I mean, back then I think I liked her even less than Cersei and Joffrey, and Joffrey is pure evil! Aunt Lysa falling out the Moon Door was the best thing to happen to Sansa this series. After that, Sansa transformed herself. I remember last season telling a friend that I liked Sansa now...

Game of Thrones – S6E3 – Oathbreaker – Recap...

Hi, and welcome to another of my recaps of Game of Thrones. For any new readers, please note, I like to use nicknames. It’s hard keeping everyone straight when they’re all bearded brunettes with long hair or blonde siblings who like to shtup each other. The episode open at the Wall, because WHERE ELSE IS IT GOING TO OPEN AFTER LAST EPISODE’S ENDING? Davos in shock by what he sees, Jon Snow breathing on the table. Jon is in even more shock than Davos. Smokey Vajayjay enters the room. She’s surprised too. That look on her face really drives home that she had 0% faith in her ability to bring Jon back. They ask Jon what he remembers. Smokey wants to know about the afterlife. Jon remembers being stabbed, but as for after death? He says it’s nothing, just nothingness. Jon actually does not seem relieved about being alive. He seems more confused about being back than happy about it. On a side note, this is the cleanest Jon has ever looked since Season 1, Episode 1. Jon heads to the yard, where his brothers in the Black and the wildlings are assembled. They’re all shocked, though Tormund manages to get a good joke it. He says that everyone thinks Jon’s a god. Jon says that he isn’t one. Tormund gets the best lines of the episode with his response: “I know that. I saw your pecker. What kind of god would have a pecker so small?” Even Jon has to smile at that one. The show cuts to a boat at sea. Sam and Gilly are on the boat. Sam is puking nonstop. Gilly is pretty upbeat, which is a total change from the books. I remember her crying her way through this...

Game of Thrones – S6E2 – Home – Recap...

The episode opens and we finally get to see the old man who is the three eyed raven. He’s not as woven into the tree as I pictured in my head from the books. He seems more encapsulated by the branches, like he just needs someone to saw him out. I’m firmly in the camp that the TV show does it better, but here I think the TV show lost out to the books. Bran is at the old man’s feet. Remember Bran? It’s been awhile! Wow, Bran has really aged since we’ve last seen him. That’s what happens when you leave a teenager out of a whole season of a show. Bran is seeing the past, specifically his dad, Ned, as a kid in Winterfell. And Winterfell never looked so good. The place is at peace, something Winterfell hasn’t seen since early in season one. Young Ned and Young Ben are practicing their swordplay in the yard. Lyanna Stark *cough* Jon’s mom! Jon’s mom! *cough* Even Bran is surprised by happy everyone is. “They were all so happy,”  he exclaims. The definition of happy in Game of Thrones is fascinating, I mean they’re still hitting each other with blunted swords. Whoa! Hodor as as a boy! And he’s talking! Hodor’s name is Wylis! Get ready for all the Hodor “Whatchu talkin’ about Wylis?” memes. Hodor is older than I thought. The old man pulls Bran out of his vision of the past. In the present, an extra from the Broadway show Cats is checking out Bran. I know, I know, she’s one of the Children of the Forest. Put your keyboard down, angry German fan. Bran asks Hodor about his past. Surprise, surprise, Hodor only responds, “Hodor.” Man, Meera has gotten older too. Meera looks like she could be Tom Hiddleston’s...

Game of Thrones – S6E1 – The Red Woman – Recap...

It’s finally here! The return of Game of Thrones! And the return of my recaps! You might remember that in order to get over some serious Games of Thrones withdrawal between seasons 4 and 5, I started reading the books. The withdrawal hit even harder between seasons 5 and 6, and I’m happy to report that I am now caught up on all the books that have been published to date. That’s right, I’m now one of those “That’s now they did in the books” people. Yay. Um. Hey, where are you going? Don’t worry, I still plan to keep these recaps full of the humor you’ve come to expect, but I might actually remember a name or two now (though Margaery will ALWAYS be Princess Low Cut). Thanks for joining me for another season. Please enjoy… Wow, that was one long ass Previously on Game of Thrones to start the episode. Did they show a scene from every episode of the series? Is a long Previously on… supposed to make it easier to tell all the brunette northmen with beards apart from each other? Or is it for people who are checking Game of Thrones out for the first time and thinking, “I’ll just jump in on this show 6 seasons in.” Smart choice there, big guy. Thankfully the Previously on… finally ends and the opening credits start. We can all agree these are the coolest opening credits of any TV show ever, right? The episode starts on the Wall. Where else would it start? My friends, family, coworkers, casual acquaintances,  baristas and I have been theorizing for 10 months as to whether or not Jon Snow is dead. If the episode started anywhere else in the Seven Kingdoms, I would have thrown...