WARNING: This post not only spoils plot points in Brothers, it also exposes both your eyes to a little explicit language and your ears to a little explicit language combined with some very off-key singing.
I recently got into Joss Whedon’s short-lived but excellent TV show Firefly. I know, I’m late to the party on this one. My favorite part of the show has to be the theme song. Anytime I watch an episode, I end up with the theme song stuck in my head for days.
It was stuck in my head while watching Brothers and I found myself singing about the movie to the tune of the Firefly theme. I realized the best way to express my thoughts on Brothers here on the blog would be through song and got to work on some more Brothers by way of Firefly song parody lyrics.
Please enjoy.
Words by Tuesday Night Movies
Music by Joss Whedon
Take my fam, take my life
My brother Tom fucked my wife
That’s what Bella told me
Gyllenhall is too sexy
Take my love, Take my fam
I’m stuck in Afghanistan
It’s okay, thought I was dead
So you fucked her in my bed
Trashed the kitchen ‘n TV
Better call the cops on me
‘Cause Tobey’s gone a bit crazy
[PSA: Brothers is now on Netflix streaming for anyone who hasn’t seen it yet]
Jake and Tobey are probably the most-convincing brothers, by appearance at least, this side of Chris O’Donnell and Sean Astin.
I have a really hard time enjoying movies where people just mope around being sad — it’s not a matter of being “good” or not, I just have no desire to watch. But if nothing else, this movie gave me solid evidence that I should never shave my head (or even part of it). I’m pretty sure I’d look even worse than Captain Tobey.
And it gets bonus points for Natalie Portman ice-skating, a la Beautiful Girls.