At The Theater 2011 #5: The Conspirator

Just before the lights went down in a theater that had only three people in it, a couple decided that the seats they needed to have were the ones right in front of us. It was Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 all over again, except more ridiculous. We waited a minute, got up and sat directly in front of them. I feared this would lead to a leapfrogging in response by the other couple. If they did leapfrog us, we could have leapfrogged them back until we were in the first two rows of the theater, but really we would have just gone back to our original seats, now with them an acceptable three rows away. But they just sat there. It felt awesome. I highly recommend pulling this move if ever confronted with the same situation.

I enjoyed The Conspirator. It is definitely better than its score of 56 on Rotten Tomatoes would lead you to believe. It was like watching To Kill a Mockingbird set in the Civil War. James McAvoy plays a retired Union soldier turned lawyer who ends up defending Mary Surratt, the lone woman charged as a co-conspirator in the assassination of Abraham Lincoln.

The Conspirator has a very strong cast. Big stars all around. James McAvoy, Robin Wright, Kevin Kline, Tom Wilkinson, Evan Rachel Wood, Justin Long, Colm Meany and Alexis Bledel are all in the movie. The standout performer though might be Justin Long’s moustache, which completely stole every scene it was in. I don’t know if it was real or if it was pasted on, but if it was real, more power to you Mr. Long. That was some crazy moustache.

Speaking of moustaches, I noticed that James McAvoy, like me, can’t grow hair in the center of his upper lip. “Yes, I’m not a freak!”flashed through my mind, “a Hollywood sex symbol has the same thing!” I not longer feel like a freak for my bifurcated moustache!

Now if I just had his hair too…

We saw The Conspirator at Brooklyn Heights Cinemas, now under new ownership. There’s some new décor and in June they ran a promotion where all seats were $8 on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Hopefully they keep at least one of these discount days going in the future. The popcorn is still delicious and is still my number one in the city.